Day Eighteen

Intuition that the day was not going to be propitious flowed through her nerves. She was expecting her dad’s phone call. The only person whom Nancy feared was her dad. And that was purely because of his love for her. Any time, she feared love. ‘Lord, let not you or any boor tie me down with love’ - that was her eternal prayer. She knew that dad is in for great disappointment. She was aware of the tears which that man is going to shed on her account. She always prayed that she maybe absolved of the responsibility for those tears. That was like seeking advance bail.

That’s why she felt palpitation when the telephone rang. Her guess was right. Knocking on the glass door, Bhaskaran Nair called her.

‘Varghese, your daughter is here, speak with her. It is STD, so don’t waste time.’

 ‘Dad’ she answered the call.

‘Child, the proposal that Antony brought is good. Didn’t you like him?’

‘Dad....’ she fumbled not knowing what to say. ‘They are demanding too much of dowry.’

‘I will manage the dowry issue. Antony will negotiate and fix it. My daughter need not enquire such matters. Did you like him?’

‘Let me think it over, Dad. It is a matter of living together for the whole of life. Should not regret later.’

‘Antony says it is a good proposal. Don’t decline it.’

‘When are you coming dad?’

‘Once your marriage is fixed, immediately.’

‘I shall write to you.’

She kept the telephone back on the cradle. When dad’s face came to her mind, standing thoughtful after placing the receiver back, she said.

‘Poor Dad!’

Rajan also said the same thing, ‘Poor man!’

They did not speak for long. She was recounting. When Bhaskaran Nair asked about the proposal she had said nothing. Did she decide either way? She herself was not sure. Shaji’s face resembled that of Judas is not a fault according to her. If he had love for her, probably she should have consented. Had he said, ‘I love you’ and ‘to make you my own I am prepared to forego dowry’, she would have readily said yes. But she felt this as pure business. Is this how you start a married life?

She looked at the young man sitting in front of her. Who is this man with a face resembling Jesus? What is his relationship with me? Rajan was in deep thought. Nancy noticed with concern that the ice cream in front of him is melting. She asked.

‘What are you thinking?’

He did not say anything.

‘If you don’t need the ice cream, say so; there are people waiting here.’

Laughingly, he pushed the cup towards her from which he had taken only two spoonsful. Nancy started relishing it as if doing a great sacrifice. She was behind none when it comes to sacrifices. Rajan’s laugh was momentary. He was once again engaged in deep thought.

Night.

Keeping the diary open in front, Nancy contemplated for a long time. She found out that if one wants to see goodness in her diary, it is enough to count the number of days with Masala Dosa and Ice cream. She noted with satisfaction that the number of such days is increasing. It was just before coming out of the restaurant that he asked.

‘Have you ever thought of a life with me?’

She said immediately, ‘Yes.’

‘Say more.’

‘It is there in Mathews’ book. The eternal fire which is kept ready for Satan and his messengers. Which means Hell.’

‘I was thinking that you have no brain.’

‘I have. That’s why I decided to marry a Nair.’

‘A Nair? You didn’t say a Hindu?’

‘No. Only Nair. Because Nairs are simple. They listen to their wives and remain henpecked!’

‘How wonderful are the castles in air that this Achaythi (Christian lady) builds!’

Keeping the diary in front, she laughed. It was eleven o clock in the night. If I delay going to bed further, it will be difficult to get up early tomorrow morning. She closed the diary.

Lying in bed, she remembered her dad. It pained her to see that she did not record in her diary, what dad had told her over phone. Sounds of the night are accusing her. What does this all mean?’