Day Twenty One

Saturday passed off uneventful. It was an old man’s face that peered out of the engine driver’s cabin. Either it could be that Rajan got old overnight, or this must be another driver. She assumed the second to be correct. Once at Ernakulum South station, she went to the cabin to ascertain. Yes, it was an old man. Scratching the short white beard, he was standing there as if to bless the passengers that he had carried in the train. Nothing to hope for, Nancy thought. Tomorrow is Sunday which means she has to run her train without driver for two days!

The news brought by uncle who came running before going to church, was not at all encouraging. The prospective groom wanted to marry Nancy. But the dowry amount cannot be reduced; and the forty sovereigns that was demanded should also be given. The second one only gave her some hope. That her dad would decline approval to this proposal for the reason that they are not prepared to reduce the dowry amount.  On that Sunday night, instead of writing the diary, she wrote a letter to her father. After keeping it in her bag, she slept comfortably.

When she got out of her house the next day morning, she had no plans to visit the temple. But her legs led her to the temple. As he gave the prasadam, the Poojary asked smiling. 

‘You were not seen for the last few days.’

‘Jesus,’ Nancy thought, ‘Is this guy also in love with me?’ Apologizing for calling Jesus inside the temple, she accepted the prasadam from the Poojary.

She had resolved to jump in front of the train if Rajan was not there in the cabin that day. It was not necessary. He is sitting inside the cabin, head protruding out with a beaming face. Nancy turned her head away and boarded the compartment. The actors in the athakshari are sitting ready for the show.

It was when she was about to step on the pedestrian over bridge without going till the end of the train as usual, that she noticed it. Rajan was standing outside the engine room. When she looked at him, he called her, smiling at her. When she went to him, he asked, ‘Why this enmity?’

‘Why did you take leave on Saturday without sanction?’

‘Whose sanction?’

‘Mine’

‘Will tell you when we meet in the evening.’

‘Suppose we don’t meet in the evening?’

‘Then it will not be told.’

I am cornered. Nancy thought. Letter to her dad, with its explosive content,  was burning a hole in her bag. She did not know how dad would take it. Whatever it be, I am not bothered. I have to take some decisions. Walking with the crowd she once again thought. That letter; should I post it? She walked past after presenting the usual smile to the policeman who stopped the traffic to let her cross the road. When she reached in front of the post office, she took out the letter from the bag. Controlling her urge to read that letter once again, she dropped it in the box.  If she read that once again, probably she would not post it.

 ‘At what stage is your marriage proposal?’ Bhaskaran Nair asked.

‘Sir, how are you able to take such profound matters so lightly?’

‘That means you have started taking matters seriously. And I am happy.’

‘Sir, you need not be that happy.’

‘Why?’

‘I am going to run away with a Nair boy.’

‘Why run? Can’t you walk?’

‘Sir, you are taking it as a joke. You will realize it once I am found missing.’

‘Alright, who is that unfortunate man?’

‘The name of that fortunate man, who practiced penance for seven births for getting me, is Rajan.’

‘What is he?’

‘He carries me daily from Angamali to Ernakulam.’

‘Which means?’

‘He is an engine driver.’

Bhaskaran Nair fell silent.

Rajan sitting across the table kept on smiling at her. The restaurant is almost empty. On Mondays, the crowd is generally thin.

‘If I arrange in a single line all the Masala Dosas I ate, it will run the distance from earth to moon and back!’ Said Nancy.

‘If I arrange the currency notes I spent for that in a line it would run round the Milky Way twice!’ Rajan said. ‘Okay. But you didn’t tell me why you kept a long face in the morning.’

‘Because I have a beautiful face.’ Nancy said. ‘It is not that …. If you miss a person whom you meet daily won’t you feel upset? It will be expressed in many ways. Can you disclose now where you disappeared to on Saturday?’

‘I am transferred. Again. Back to Coimbatore.’

Nancy sat as if she could not believe this.

‘I had gone to enquire if it was possible to avoid the transfer. They said it was not possible. They insist that I should be there for at least three months. They will consider my request later.’  

Nancy was sitting dumbfound without eating the dosa. Her face was gloomy.

‘Are you sad because you will have to say good bye to Dosas and Ice creams?’

Nancy was not smiling. Suddenly he saw that. Tears welling up in her eyes. They are dripping down her chubby face.  

Nancy crying! This girl knows how to cry too? Rajan took her hand in his and pressed it gently.

It was the day when writing diary turned out to be a solace for her. The sounds of the night gave her company. Her sister who was sleeping peacefully on the cot did not know anything. She recalled what Bhaskaran Nair had told her. Never love an engine driver; their lives are over the rolling wheels. They will not be able to stay put anywhere. Oh, big deal! She closed the diary. However, she did not record that Rajan kissed her secretly while coming out of the restaurant, on the stairs. Let that remain in my heart - my closest diary.   

She did not give a reply to Rajan’s query whether she would wait for him. It was not necessary. He was leaving that night. Has to join duty at Coimbatore on Tuesday. He was supposed to join on Monday. But he had sought permission for one day to bid adieu to the beautiful girl who had stolen his heart while travelling from Angamaly to Ernakulam. ‘Don’t be happy as yet.’ Rajan said. ‘I have appealed to one more person. If that clicks, I shall board this very same train and be back- to pester you!’

‘I am not that fortunate!’ Nancy said.