Day Six

Nancy realized to her delight that instead of Before Christ and After Christ, her time line has now been reduced to Before Meeting Engine Driver and After Meeting Engine Driver. I need to write as sixth day ED. Must ask Rajan to grow a beard. With a beard he would look like Jesus. There is a picture of Jesus in deep prayers in her sister’s room. Below the picture are placed a gold coated cross and a candle stand. Nancy suddenly started liking that picture. She expressed her intense liking by lighting a candle before the picture as soon as she returned from the office... Mary was surprised. Normally, Nancy has to be dragged to the church and even then, she would be spending time chatting with boys if she finds them. She doesn’t pay attention to the Holy Mass. Father Valiyedeth had called Mary once or twice before and had rebuked her. Mary was advised to keep an eye on her sister. ‘This age is treacherous. Better be careful. How long has it been since she confessed? Ask her to come up to the ‘Pallimeda’ and meet me’

That very same girl is now eager to light the candle in front of Jesus Christ as soon as she returns from office! Mary was relieved to note the change. But it did not take long for the relief to revert back to concern. As she was getting ready to go to the church on Sunday morning she called out to her sister, ‘Valiyedath Father said that he must see you.’

‘See me?’

‘Yes, he said it is a long time since you confessed.’

‘I have not committed any sin for that, sister.’

‘It is not necessary to have committed any sin to confess. All of us are born sinners. It is the holy blood of Jesus that freed us from sin. So, we have to purify our mind and spirit by frequent confessions.’

‘I was thinking of something ...’ Nancy said looking at Mary.

‘What?’

‘Why instead of becoming the bride of the Lord you settled as the bride of my brother-in-law Mathew?’

‘Get lost.’

‘Serves right,’ Nancy continued, ‘so our Lord is saved!’

 ‘Are you coming? It’s time for the Qurbana (Holy Mass).’

‘Sister, I had told Rajni that I would visit her today. Her brother has come from the Gulf. She promised to get me some items he brought at a discount.’

‘So, this week also you are not going to attend the Qurbana!’

Qurbana! Nancy thought. Nowadays, everything’s for name sake.  She saw in her mind the royal entry of young priest Father Valiyedath cutting in the middle, the song by brother Peter who has been singing in the church for long. With the two thin Altar Boys on either side, the priest stands at the altar and shows the sign of cross.

‘Praise the Lord living at great heights, may all the good hearted on earth get peace and hope, always and eternally. Amen!’

Father’s words never falter. It is the result of years of devoted practice. He wished to keep his sheep in bondage with those words. As for those who would not agree to be tied with words, he did not try too hard to bring those sheep back. He knew its futility. Nancy knows why he looks at the watch during the Qurbana. Exactly at 9 O’clock he would finish the Qurbana giving ‘osthi’, the flesh and blood of Jesus. Thereafter, he runs to Pallimeda. Nancy thought laughing; exactly at nine, the TV serial ‘Sreekrishna’ starts. He practically runs, to make sure that he does not miss it!

‘To watch Sreekrishna serial.’ Nancy laughed out loud. Actually, they show advertisements in the first ten minutes. But even those advertisements caught Father’s fancy. It is a magical web. Different fashions, images of people with no fashions; everything transported Father to another world. What he could not see in real life, revealed itself through the visual media. When the scenes cross all borders, Father would pray showing the sign of cross. ‘Jesus, save me and my little sheep from Satan’s temptations.’

Visual media is influencing spirituality in an undesirable manner.

Mary was angry.

‘If you are not coming, it is your business. Let Satan catch you. When I saw you lighting candle in front of Jesus, I thought ….’

Off she goes taking Nelson with her.

Nancy thought of Rajan. Rather, her sister made her think of him. At five in the evening he waits at the station gate. She can see the tall and straight personality from a distance. When she goes closer to him a smile blooms on his slightly long face.

‘You look like Jesus returning from the sermon on the mountain.’ She says.

‘That means, spiritual light is flowing abundantly from my face!’

He would walk along with Nancy, chatting.

‘That is why I call you savior.’

‘Not because I really saved you, from under the train?’

‘Both are same. Original savior saves my spirit. This duplicate savior saves my life. That’s all! And I am harassed by the two saviors!’

‘What is there to be harassed?’

‘Back at home I face my sister’s spiritual harassments. Here my second savior harasses me by following me everywhere.’

‘I am not walking along with you to harass you’ Rajan said. ‘Being a loyal employee of the railway department, I am dutybound to prevent anyone from damaging its property.’

‘Who is damaging railway property?’

‘You! That day I could prevent you from damaging the railway platform. So, I walk along with you, not following you, and ensure that you board the train. I return to my quarters satisfied that I protected railway property from damage.’

‘That’s all.’

‘Yes.’

With the diary kept open in front of her, she was thinking. I am not going to keep a count of days anymore; what type of person is he? Even days after getting acquainted, he only walks aside without uttering a loving word or even a suggestion to visit a restaurant. It is true that this man acts differently from others. Other boys need only a smile to take it as signal to take things forward. Within two days it leads to a visit to a restaurant or a park. Third day…. Oh, no! Nancy is not ready for that, never. She knows where to draw a line with the boys. Isn’t there a via media between these two?

‘You are a strange person.’ She said one day. ‘Even after getting acquainted with a beautiful girl you don’t feel like taking her to a park?’

‘What is there to enjoy in a park?’

‘You are not at all romantic. It is true that even I don’t have much of an opinion about parks. But restaurants; they attract me very much.’

‘But me, not the least!’ Rajan said.

‘Fear of monetary loss, isn’t it?’

‘Your intelligence is appreciated!’

As it stands it is better to discontinue writing a diary. At the age of sixty, if by any chance I happen to read this, I may commit suicide seeing its utter hollowness. She closed the diary and lay down to sleep. Chechi is praying. Bending down, she was praying deeply. Once the prayer is over and after showing the sign of cross, she told Nancy.

‘Father Valiyedth enquired about you.’

‘I am blessed!’ Nancy said.

Pretending not to notice the mocking tone in her sister’s voice, Mary continued.

‘It is enough if you drop in at Pallimeda on the way to office. Can you make it tomorrow?’

The aching heart of the shepherd troubled by the straying little sheep, spoiled Nancy’s sleep. Someone must have carried tales about her to the Father. Railway platform is not a closed room. Thousands of people throng there. Someone who has seen her walking with Rajan must have informed Father. She liked Father Valiyedath. She used to wonder as to why a handsome person like him opted to be a priest. He would look like a film star for sure, if he changed his attire from his cassock to a glamorous suit. Anyway, she decided to go to Pallimeda the very next day morning and meet the Father. Spiritual contentment was filling her mind, and eventually she slipped into a deep sleep.